Growing Pains

In life you trip, you fall down, you get back up. Well I didn't exactly fall down; tremble a little bit on a shaky pose maybe. This yoga practice I noticed a lot of things, like for instance, deep breathing isn't a trifling matter. The meditations seemed to be more taxing then the physical movements during today's practice. I could actually feel pain, but it wasn't anything tangible. Still it was there. Perhaps some bits of trapped negative energy from my many gloomy childhood memories, or maybe it was an old pre-programed thought process that needed to leave my body and mind. Whatever it was, it was reaching out for nourishment. I really had to pace myself during my Kundalini. I was definitely pushing my self-imposed boundaries today. I'm right at the edge of a precipice that I'll admit feels a little daunting. I can tell I'm headed for a breakthrough. I could actually feel my heart chakra opening up. It's an unusual sensation. I'm sure for everybody, releasing the holds on their chakras is a different experience. For me it was almost as if in the center of my chest there was this tired spot.And as I stretched further, and let healing light into it, it was expanding, being pried open just a bit more like a slow yawn. This is what it would feel like if my heart could yawn. When I think about it I guess my heart has went through a lot to make it weary. It's been hurt, broken, sad, confused, joyous, disillusioned, inspired, exercised, on various diets, discouraged, loved, warm, cold as ice, and a myriad other conditions. It's also been serving my body for 33 years of life, and I haven't always given it the pampering it deserves. So yeah it's a tired heart. It's entitled to a little TLC, a little space to sit back and say 'now I can just relax and let go'. Kundalini allowed me to do that today for which I'm eternally and divinely grateful. Each day yoga reminds me to be thankful for the little things and to cherish the gifts that I have right now, despite the hard times. This too is part of healing.